RUDDY, SET, GO!

For all of you fortunate enough to receive the generous allowance from the Rudd Government, or for those who've saved their 'Baby Bonuses', here's a few suggestions on how to give a little back to the economy. Most of you are respectful, responsible citizens, but those few who like to splurg, forget groceries, forget petrol for the car or nappies for the infant, these little wonders below are far more important, especially, for Christmas. Who said having 6 Kids was stupid?

1. Valentino Crystal Clutch. This will keep your leftover change safe for a rainy day, or maybe for Baby Formula...........or better still, Cigarettes!!

2. CH25 Chair. Veto the traditional Christmas Table and feast on your Pudding and Brandy Custard from your Throne.......it's a good place to sit and ignore the Defacto as well.

3. EASTON PEARSON 2008/09. Carve the Turkey wearing a technicolour piece from Brisbane's Design Duo, and no-one will have any idea you've had 5 Kids from 5 different Fathers.

4. ETRO MENSWEAR 2008/09. Knock back a few cold one's while ingognito as a Greek Aristocrat.......looks can be deceiving, especially when your really a divorced Father of 4, who's secretly shagging the 18 year old next door, while collecting Worker's Comp.

5.VESPA 250GTSIE. Ride to the nearest ATM to collect your Dole payment in style, this baby can also carry a carton of VB from the Bottle-O discreetly.

6.AZZOLINI SWIMWEAR. Dress proper to wash the Datsun 180B.

7.HERMES POCKETWATCH. Because of your 8th Grade education, ask someone the time by showing off this Luxurious timepiece.

So there you go, some little brick and a little brack to make this festive season even more wondrous. And as gift from me to you, for all those who did'nt have a baby, or receive a little embellishment to your bank account to spend carefree, I APOLOGISE on behalf of Prime Minister Kevin Rudd.

If I had a Bow big enough, I'd wrap it!!